STREET FIGHTER

Last night was pretty intense. It began with a lovely dinner with a side of tonic at au vivre followed by a disappointing walk along saint laurent where every bar was closed, had a weird vibe, or simply would not yet my younger friend in. We then stumbled into a fairly large line between a group of ugly, horrific speaking college kids who were obscenely loud and obnoxious and clearly had no idea that DISTILLERIE IS TOO SMALL FOR a group the size of a small South American Country. 2 seemed to be the perfect number as we managed to skip the line at au vivre and ended up making it into distillerie finding 2 bar seats and then orderin 2 drinks before taking pictures and enjoying our rather ginormous and delicious decadently destructive poweredout mojitoes. As the mojitoes began to take effect our heads were left bopping to music and our bodies felt keyed on by the sheer deliciousness of the booze. WE opted to try a second drink, this time an epically porportioned electric lemonade with far too much alcohol but just the right amount for 2 people to freshen up their infinite daze.

MY night was a lovefest, right up until leaving saphir where i made out, hugged, and gave many praises to many of my friends because i am kind hearted and warm souled once alcohol eats away at my icy exteriour amd infinitely Soviet World like walled off heart. However things would soon go sour as an individual persisted in following us mouthing off once our bar was left in our wake. Admittedly i talk back when i necessarily shouldn't and ended up bitch slapping an individual before getting hit and punching back multiple times before being tackled by another stranger. The next thing i knew their were fists from everywhere and i didn't know whether or not my punches were finding their targets or had just misfired and made me look like some insane rave tectonic dancer in the street. As the hits got harder i began kicking those who fell in the side and back to try and keep them down before accidentally kicking my friend in the ribs who had tackled yet another attacker. Simply i remember being pulled out by Jessica and told not to go back because i had been hurt. Apparently i had been bleeding a lot from my face but i appealed by saying "ALEX CANT FIGHT MY FIGHTS FOR ME!" and tried to get back before asking jess if i "looked sexy?"

i then proceeded to second cup wherei made friends with randoms in the washroom while washing my face before being cabbed home and then taken to the hospital where i waited 20 minutes and high fived doctors. This morning i was allowed to come in later for my shift once my coworkers saw the extent of my injuries and then the clients were angelic towards me with one to go as far to bring me homeopathic medicine. i then was told my a large group of customers that i was the nicest person in the world and thanked repeatedly for being helpful as i grunted at them from an over swollen lip and completely bashed in eye. alas tonight i shall do nothing upon nothing and sleep as late as i want tomorrow before work to rest my face.

SONG FOR THE NIGHT
REDMAN- LAY YOU OUT STREET FIGHTER 2 REMIX!!!!
http://eastofla.podbus.com/mp3/LayYouOut.mp3

MOTHEREFFING GET UP STAND UP BRRRRRRT BRRRRT BRRRT HADOKEN HADOKEN

A MESSAGE TO THE MISSING

I don't know how many people are aware that there was an insane 3 day long firefight in Mumbai between Commandos and Islamic Terrorists. The terrorists eventually took hold of the Taj Mahal Hotel where a few hostages barricaded themselves in a restaurant as the attackers threw grenades and fired bullets at their barricade. These hostages(captives since they would have been outright slaughtered without mercy regardless of nationality or age) eventually staged their own assault by picking up meatcleavers and knives and fighting there way outside of the hotel into the war torn streets outside. Many people were murdered and the terrorists played a dangerous game of cat and mouse throughout the hotel with one such terrorist. They were very well trained and managed to prolong their fight for 3 days. How horrifying.

In other wordly news, the Pope recently thanked Muslims for bringing God into the public forum and was happy that they had increased the discussion about God througout the world.

The last piece of news for the day deals with the Somalian pirates who are taking Oil and Chemical Tankers hostage. Humourously enough a security detail on one such tanker had to leap off of their ship because they could no longer fight off the pirates. they left the rest of the crew there and were then nearly crushed by their own boat when the pirates decided to RAM THEM WITH THE TANKER!!!!

HORRIBLE, where's John Mcclain when you need him.

With that said, last nights loftparty made me miss all the loft parties from 2 years ago and i ended up pretty wasted by the time a fire alarm was pulled. I need more sweaty dancing nights, if only i wasn't so lazy. Work was also a dance party today and i'm very very jittery. I need to do this again

I'm off to AU VIVRE to have some succulent fake meat and i leave with this song left behind me. ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND AND DANCE DANCE DANCE.

Ben Folds- You don't Know Me
http://www.fileden.com/files/2006/11/21/402708/ben_folds-you_dont_know_me_(feat_regina_spektor).mp3

Bonnie and Clyde

ONE MORE SONG FOR THE DAY AND POST..

Who wants to go on a crime spree romance with me? That's pretty much all i feel like doing in this weather anyways

Bonnie and Clyde


http://www.fillessourires.com/ecoutez/bonnie.mp3

Let's Play Catch

So this is fairly short and pointed. It's snowing quite magnificently today(ugh) and my AKGs are back on my head. My crush came in to say hi last night after dissipating into nothingness for 2 weeks and that left me rather hyper for the night. Tomorrow's plans are LULU LEMON SWEATPANTS and a gym membership, today was completely cracked out at work and i don't think i've laughed so hard in a long time. My coworkers are absolutely loopy, but so am i.

So here's a rather mellow song but cutesy and such. For those of you who are looking for someone, as long as you fit together in bed, like 2 spoons cupped around eachother, without the impatient breathing and awkward arm placements then you should do your best to hold on. IF that person is me, just let go. I'd much rather read a novel! I need suggestions PLEASE, someone help me out here with books. You can throw one at me. Also everyone check out the new Diplo ft Jhi Ali
GET THE NEW ALBUM HERE pay what you want
http://maddecent.com/paperroute/
Grrr.
Jets Overhead- It's a funny thing
http://aolradio.podcast.aol.com/aolmusic/mp3s/JetsOverhead_ItsAFunnyThing.mp3

Gotye- Thanks for your time
http://www.carlsandburgvisits.com/Music/November%202008/05%20Thanks%20For%20Your%20Time.mp3

CHARLOTTE GAINSBOURG- OPERATION REMIX
http://www.fillessourires.com/ecoutez/The%20Operation%20(25%20Hours%20A%20Day%20Remix).mp3

Hi, Your English is Showing

Now respectfully i do my best to speak french at work and generally pull it off very well, especially in the wee hours of the morning when the majority of clients are french and i'm by my lonesome. With that said, no doubt my english accent shines through and when i'm with friends i just refuse to speak french simply because i am too shy about it. However, some people are so blatantly anti-french canadien or anti any other language than english that it's absolutely disgusting. It's almost like xenophobia and i'm not talking about tourists. It maddens me because i often say out loud, "I wish i was born a french canadien," and i think people should respect the language as equally as english. Maybe not in scholarly pursuits but at least the social aspect of it.

Since that rant is over i would also like to scream at people that "Boccacino's" is a restaurant and there is no such sandwich called the "Boccacino Betty." The sign says Boccacini Betty and as far as i know no one really wants a chain restaurant between two slices of bread to munch on. If you order a "Boccacino Betty" and a tea i will specifically deficate on your face in my head. This is because i have no idea what kind of tea you are ordering if you simply say, "TEA." If you follow up tea with, "A regular tea," i often want to jump across the counter and lay one on when clients look at me like i'm stupid for asking what flavour they want. THERE IS NOT JUST ONE KIND OF TEA, THERE IS BLACK TEA, GREEN TEA, PERFUMED TEA, and HERBAL TEA, i do not know what a regular tea is for you.

With all of that typed out i would also like to write that i have never in my life been called a whore or skank so many times within a ten day period. I don't even know what i did to earn this kind of obuse from strangers and coworkers but apparently i reak of slut. Good God, even when i dress well and carry myself appropiatly people still view me as a whore. I don't get it.

Lastly, it's time for me to get another tattoo. I'm craving one like a crackfiend craves money to buy crack, so much that they will perform sexual acts for the means to afford their habit. This is very true and i'll slut myself out for the chance at a freebie ink session. I'm also somewhat taken by 2 clients at work. Both insanely gorgeous and both with epically stellar monumentally amazing smiles and eyes.

Now back to playing some Mirror's Edge.
Song for the Night
I hate December-Ivy
http://girljukebox.typepad.com/sugartown/files/03_i_hate_december.mp3

SONG FOR THE NIGHT.

Catchy C Chatterbox

My sleeping pill is floating within my veins now and has significantly decreased any sort of function going on within my cranium. the neurons are firing sporadically, even drunkenly, and last nights misadventure can paint a better view of where im headed but i just don't know how to get there. it's the bright lights from the sky with the storefronts and flashy shoes with the cheap come-ons and bring me homes that single my slope is down though. I'm not that much of a slut or a whore. i just have my moments and they are always passing. i can't be so vicious all the time and i pride myself on my mixed up sense of morals.

My mouth also spits out things i can't quite keep in and in the most improper situations. Pretending i'm Optimus Prime with the reverb from the salad bar at work is definetly one of those moments and my hands are reaching out when before i was happy with them in my pockets or hella anywhere but on someone unless i thought of a certain return. The glance that was shot my way by customers was fairly worth it and the hugs i've recieved for saying things i can't quite remember make me happy(as well as alert me to my mouth needing to be kept close). More importantly, it may not be completely appropriate to tell customers that the green tea may save their prostate in the future or better yet make loud squeely guitar noises running around work. Also maybe i should keep my secrets as opposed to having none. Bygolly my mouth has gotten me into trouble, completely unintentionally for the most part. t here's those times where im just rude and revealing to make scenes though.

My brain speaks, "it's time to calm down joshua. You're getting old and it's time to settle down"
MY heart speaks, "Don't settle down Josh, searching for that something in the conquests just made you realize there's nothing to search for. It's a void and accept it!" SILLY SILLY ORGANS DON'T HAVE VOICES

Chatterbox i am. To work in 5 hours, i hope everyone is staying warm.
NEW KANYE FOR THE NIGHT
STreetlights
http://www.blackdynamite.com/trailer

Snow, Shit, and Special Someone all start with "s"

Today was an absolutely fantastic day, that is until white death started raining down upon the ground. It wouldn't be so absolutely invasive had it not started to ACCUMULATE. I can't believe snow thinks it has the right to do that, but hey at least i wasn't trapped ina car for 8 hours on a snowy highway. Can we label snow an "International Terrorist" now. I think it does some pretty terrible things.

To make matters worse, after a great day buying and eating organic i found myself walking home from work with a bit of a twitter in my ear. No, no, not the pleasant ring-a-ding-ding of music but that of something rattling around within my 230 dollar pair of headphones. That's right folks, something is internally wrong with my headphones. I have to drag them back downtown and trade them in or order a newpair of my beautiful lovely AkG 530s. They are my lifeline, my lover, and my greatest friend as of the moment and i can not believe they have betrayed me too, like all things i give my all to.

Also Wall*E is equally cute the second time around and i wish all relationships could consist of conversations involving one word and tones. I have to jump out of bed in 6 hours to start another long and horrific day of work and my lunesta is starting to hit the spot. The spot that usually requires the comfort of someone else to sleep, or even emotional satisfaction, I on the other hand do not need such things and in fact often would rather sleep by my lonesome once the occasional deed is done.

So here's to wanting nothing more than to hold hands or make that special someone smile. Go away winter so i can keep being ice hearted , not icy on the skin.

Billie Holiday- When You're Smiling
http://www.moteldemoka.com/moka/smiling.mp3

Joshua the Vegan(Vaginal Related?)

My recently readopted vegetarian inclination has started to flourish into that of a vegan. I've felt increasingly more and more healthy as i eradicated meat from my diet as well as milk. I've taken the next step of striking out the cheeses and eggs but am a tad worried for my once in a while breakfast excursions for my newly discovered omlette. Until 2 summers ago i never ate breakfast and the idea of eating the product of a Chicken's vagina seemed less than tremendously compelling.

Maybe i just don't want to eat things that come out of an animal's vagina or milksacks. How absolutely stupendous and articulate of me to type that sentence(ugh). In all seriousness the idea is absolutely disgusting and brings to mind a certain kind of bondage i have no interest in exploring. Some S&M freaks may get off to the milking of themselves or others but for the most part the process of milk drinking and production should stop and end at the baby. Eggs are an entirely different story but it's certainly taboo to speak about eating the placenta of a human(completely different i know, but still a vaginal product).

I find it bitterly cold outside and a headache has locked me inside of my humble domain where i have made a completely vegan meal consisting of fake chicken breasts, peanut teriyaki sauce, and freshly cooked thai rice. It's being consumed in a fine shell shaped bowl with of all things a fork. I am too lazy for the particularities of consuming mainly rice with two sticks at this moment.

With the cold weather and the decreased sunlight hitting our skins it's important to stay positive as our vitamin d levels start to drop to meager levels.

The Streets- Stay Positive
http://www.schoolofmix.com/music/sp-stayposs.mp3

Cold Weather and the Cold of Moonlighting Bars

Blogging is new to me and it's mainly meant to entertain myself as well as add some interesting music to the palettes of any of those who are reading it. This topic pertains to the event of my often floundering over beautiful barmaids like most guys. The only difference with barmaids is my incapability to talk to them unless particularly hammered or otherwise in a weird stupor. Mainly i feel as if it's all things they've heard before, mainly because they have, and even if my intentions are somewhat admirable i fear the inevitable scoff and eye roll.

So i suited up on Saturday night, not looking my best, and found myself being bombared by miniature water missiles from the sky. Upon finding refuge in a bar to watch our beloved Montreal Canadiens (under performing right now) we were served by a rather fetching waitress who acted not full of herself but played rather aloof. The point of this elaborate story is that i found myself slowly drinking myself to talking to her but never the less kept my tongue tight in it's mouth. However my eyes could not help but peer at her slimfitting jeans are tiny shoulders. The light fluff of her hair and her porcelain skin kept bringing my eyes away from the frosty ice and the moving puck but rather to her clavicles and strut. Alas i never grew the courage in my gut strong enough to make an absolute full of myself and found myself quite comfortable with another beer and some fatty fries to mark the beginning of what would be a very long night.

It's so much more fun to wonder about the possibilities than to know the consequences positive or negative sometimes. It's as if you waited years upon years for the touch of an admired one's lips and were met with dry, raspy, and awkward blowfish like kissing. How dissapointing would that be? Where would the fantasy go?
Anyways, it's frightengly cold outside and neverso more noticeable than at 6:35 in the morning as i rushed to work. So here's a song to stay somewhat warm too and think about those potential romances with bar staff that's probably already spoken for.

The Miserable Rich- The Barmaid's Canon
http://www.box.net/shared/vh9bleyqav

And here's something a tad more wintery
Jay Jay Pistolet- Holly
http://www.fileden.com/files/2008/8/8/2040924/05%20Holly.mp3
Salutations and stay warm

Betcha Heard Bells Boy-o

As the cool air rushes by taking its toll on my skin i can't help to smell the snow in the air and suddenly found a new sort of symbolism running throughout my mind. Today was a good day, where metafiction and instruments consumed my sickened body. I discovered that i should play music behind all of the people i meet to make more enjoyable. Alas i can't hear a conversation with my lovely AKGs on my head so ill have to buy a boombox or a stereo to be implanted directly into my ear canals when conversations begin and others falter. I suppose my calloused heart is finding it's release to a string written by johann johannsson or a vocalist from sigur ros crooning out into the private world ive created between the speakers. I get shivers at 6am stepping outside, but not from the cold, no from the music and the the shapes of things.

With that said everyone should check out Johann Johannsson trilogy of albums about communicating computers and their eventual loss to us. it's all instrumental and makes quite a good winter listen or even wine and bedtime. The albums can be found here http://www.johannjohannsson.com/ for digital downloads at low prices or pirated(as most of us do)


This is life on the Bside for Joshua. The Boring Side, The Responsible Side.